Wednesday, January 27, 2010

Escape the Valentine’s Day Blues

This is a re-post from life coach Stacey Vicari's blog. Check out her services at She has amazing insight and I really enjoy working with her.

Escape the Valentine’s Day Blues

by Stacey Vicari

Whether we’re part of a couple or not, many of us find February 14 a challenge.

After all, if there is a special someone in the picture, it can be a struggle to find the right gift for him or her.

And if you don’t currently have a romantic partner, it’s easy to feel sad or left out.

Whatever your situation this year, here are a couple of ideas that may help…

Choosing a romantic gift for someone special

The best gift to give someone is the gift they want to receive. But how do you know what that is?

Here’s a tip: Focus on what he or she complains about not getting enough of ….And then give that.

Maybe it’s an evening of unbridled passion — or maybe it’s freshly vacuumed floors. Maybe you often hear “We never talk anymore” or “I’d just like to relax and have a quiet evening for once.”

Remember that the best gifts don’t always come from a store.

If your significant other’s idea of romantic evening is a couple of hours of chatting, with no agenda — and that makes you cringe — maybe Valentine’s Day is a good opportunity to give her what she wants.

If your partner’s idea of a great Valentine’s Day is a hot sexual encounter — and all you can think about is the stack of laundry downstairs – maybe this is a great chance to let go of the need for household perfection and get a different kind of exercise.

The things people complain about can give us tremendous insight – if only we can stop being defensive and start listening.

No romance in sight?

Sure, we often think of February as the month of romantic love. But the reality is that all of us go through times when we have no romantic partner.

And let’s face it: not all partners are always romantic.

So if we’re always looking outside ourselves for romantic love, we’re missing out.

Why not take February to fall in love with your SELF?

How? First, ask yourself how you define romantic love. What do you find romantic? Make a list. Then think of how you – yourself – can bring more of that into your life.

For example, many of us think having someone bring us flowers is a romantic gesture. Why wait for someone else to give you flowers?

If having fresh flowers in your home nurtures you and makes you feel more romantic, give yourself flowers.

We can bring romantic moments into our life every day by defining what they are. Light candles, take a long walk in the park, bask in the moment.

Falling in love with your SELF means living a life that includes the things you love. It means taking time for yourself, even if that requires you to reframe your life and expectations, or to re-evaluate your schedule in terms of your commitments with and to others.

The bottom line

This Valentine’s Day, take time to create some romance in your life — whether you’re in a relationship with someone else, or not.

1 comment: